8yo: [leaning over to whisper in my ear]. when the brownies are done, we can feast on them like monkey with red eyes and ears of doom….

oh, I messed that up 



and 6 minutes later

me: [eating breakfast and yawning because i’m not awake]

8yo: [from across the room]  yawns don’t make sense to feet.

me: [headdesk]


so how’s your weekend starting?

i’ve been up on a saturday for 5 whole minutes.

8yo:  [coming up next to me and staring at me like a meerkat] socks like cookies too.

me:  … go. away.