told kids that cousin Michael would try to fix my mom and dad’s computer camera so we could Skype – they messed it up again. they said how come Michael can fix it and not them? I said my parents aren’t very good at computers, but Michael is.

5yo: here is one thing that Michael is very bad at: shimmer [temporary tattoos].

7yo: yeah, he’s horrible.

me: i’ll tell Michael you just dissed him. LMAO!