this was my putting the kids to bed tonight:
9yo [singing]: tractor! gonna see a chiropractor! he’s gonna fix my backtor! [dies laughing and rolling around on the bed]
[sidenote: clearly i need to rethink letting them watch the fairly oddparents]
6yo [as i tell her to get off the covers and under them]: booty up in the air! booty down on the ground! booty booty all around! [dissolves into giggling fit]
5yo just got out of the shower. i told her to get dressed. then i hear from her room….
5yo: i’m shaking my butt, my butt, my butty butt bum. i’m shaking my booty butt, my booty wooty wooty. my bum bummy bum. i’m shaking my toot bum, my bottttooommmm. [giggling hysterically and running around in front of a mirror]
i’m laughing but that same time, she scares me. a. lot.
7yo [singing at the top of her lungs about 4yo]: she’s a bootyshaker. wo oh oh. she’s a bootyshaker. that’s what she is.
4yo: mama, what color is an elephant with a bunny?
me: um, furry color?
me: the bunny and elephant are buttery colored??
4yo: yes, see the pancake…
me: wait a minute. pancake? where did a pancake come into this?
4yo: FROM THE BOOTY!!
whereupon 4yo and 7yo dissolve into hysterical giggles. that noise is my head exploding.
3yo’s response to story was doing a booty shaking dance all around the playroom. just. for. daddy.