I just want to pee in peace

6yo: [knocks on door to the bathroom I am in and then walks in] hi.

me: yes?

6yo: [turns around,  shows me her bum and scratches it]

me: *sigh* go away.

6yo: [repeats actions]

me: I don’t want to see you scratch your bum. Get out. [smacks her bum]

6yo: no, not until you say butt.

me: no.  go away.

6yo: yes!

me: no.  get out.

6yo: yes.

me: NO.  get.  out.

6yo: [huff at me then storms out of the bathroom,  slamming the door]

me: [shaking head, but thinking] I win

hold me, please

5yo just got out of the shower. i told her to get dressed.  then i hear from her room….

5yo: i’m shaking my butt, my butt, my butty butt bum. i’m shaking my booty butt, my booty wooty wooty.  my bum bummy bum. i’m shaking my toot bum, my bottttooommmm. [giggling hysterically and running around in front of a mirror]

i’m laughing but that same time, she scares me. a. lot.