me [to 7yo]: it’s bedtime.
7yo: I WILL NOW LEAVE THE ROOM IN AN EXTREMELY WEIRD WAY. [wiggles, hops, jumps, spins, dances, tumbles out the door with a bizarre look on her face]
whereupon daddy and i look at each other, shake our heads and start laughing.
6yo [calling out from her bed where she is reading before going to sleep]: mamaaaaaa, i haaaave a neeeww waaay of tellinggggg you whennn i’m done reeeeading. [voice inflecting up and down] it invooolves making weeeird noisesssss.
me: um, no.
6yo: too late! i already signed the contract giving me the right to do it! [laughing loudly]
me [muttering to myself]: damn soulsucker genes….
O.M.G. rearranging 9yo’s room so we can fit in her new bookcase. the amount of paper and plastic we found (mind you, only weeks after I spent 2 days cleaning up the majority of it) could fuel a small country, and the amount of cheerios and m&ms could feed it!!!! AND THIS IS MY NEAT CHILD!!! *collapses on the floor in despair*
oh good gosh. because they behaved so well at the museum, 8 yo and her camp group got to get 2ft long pixie sticks filled with sugar.
kill. me. now.
oh good gosh. since they behaved so well at the museum, 8yo and her camp group got to get 2ft long pixie sticks full of sugar. kill. me. now.
there are 2 Furbies in my family room blah blahing and talking like Valley girls to each other. kill. me. now.
trapped over by a speaker at a skating rink. kill. me. now.
7yo just informed me that, if i can’t get a baby brother to “come out,” she will get one for Christmas.
4yo is running around the house with a plastic play grocery cart, slamming it into everything. kill. me. now.
7yo running around the house screaming: i can move it move it. i’m sexy and i know it.
great. wonderful. kill me now.