pants as a defense mechanism?

me: when we get home, we are cutting both your nails.

8yo:  no!!! i’m going to hide in 2 pairs of my pants to get away from you.

me and daddy: ……

winnie the pooh…sort of

both my kids are happily making their giant pooh bears into transvestites.  specifically “making over” their fur with brushes and hair accessories.

4yo: our girls are going to be pink and purpletastic.

7yo:  don’t forget to brush your pooh press-on nails too.

whack a mole

3yo after being caught out of bed and put back there:  look mama, it’s 5 o’clock [pointing to clock which says 9:05], and i didn’t see you in the bathroom, you were supposed to take our pink blowdryer and blow dry your nails, sometimes it’s dark when i go to bed, sometimes i hear the owls and sometimes i don’t hear the owls [which are not what they seem?], and they didn’t have tiger nails, did they?