i’m a single mother of two kids and a zombie, apparently

i walk in the door coming home from work.  7yo runs up to me to say hello.

daddy:  did you tell mama about me?

7yo:  daddy has a bandage on his arm. he says he was bitten by a zombie and now he’s going to turn into a zombie. and when he’s tired, he wants to eat brains.  [giving daddy very skeptical look]

daddy:  and i’m coming for you later, tasty brain girl.  [7yo screams and hides behind me, pretending to shake with fear]

me: so glad i came home. [contemplates going back to work]


i’m getting tired just listening to this

kids are making a sign for a “day spa” they are creating for me on my bed (read:  total destruction of my bed which will not be cleaned up by them later).

8yo [to 5yo]:  make the sign extra extra pretty.

5yo: but i can’t make it THAT pretty because….my arms are going to get tired.

8yo:  ok, then, make it pretty, then take a break and rest your arms, then make it prettier.

5yo:  okay

so.  cute.