11yo: my shorts are on fire and my shirt speaks like a pig. [exits room]
me:….
11yo: my shorts are on fire and my shirt speaks like a pig. [exits room]
me:….
8yo: [leaning over to whisper in my ear]. when the brownies are done, we can feast on them like monkey with red eyes and ears of doom….
oh, I messed that up
me:….
8yo decided that it’s OK to write Santa and ask for things during the year. What does she ask for? For the elf to come the day after Thanksgiving. #KillMeNow
4yo: bye, sandy papers.
daddy: sandy papers? what’s that?
4yo: it peels your face off.
daddy: o.O
4yo [while we are taking a morning walk]: that dog is cute. but dogs can’t go to school. but they CAN watch you sleep. but horses cannot watch you sleep. horses CAN. NOT.
6yo: i moved the easel by the art cabinet. it was my idea, so if you want to use it, you have to give me 10 cents. and if you want to show anyone your art once you’re done, you need to give me 20 bucks. that way i can go to Disney and buy the huge Minnie Mouse.
is it wrong that when i taught 4yo to say the name of her new toy [Innotab] and she repeated it over and over, all i could think of was the zombie people in the Mummy saying Imhotep Imhotep?
“If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, ‘keep away from children.’”
Susan Savannah